hits in 1999!NA Way of Life
Out House
General Crisis
30 Jun 1998
Dear Fellow Members,
A fellowship wide crisis may be in motion right now. If so, I would suggest that there is
a leadership
vacuum at the world level. I have seen this before and it will pass. One possible
explanation for
what is happening is that people who have depended on the shrinking window of group
conscience
have been able to fool themselves into thinking they could have an effective say without
having a
commitment.
Responsibility is a big part of NA and our recovery process is built on personality
change. We move
in recovery from drug disabled ineffectuality to the dawn of a reality we only suspected
was there.
The "weight" of this administrative function may have collapsed the old system
forming in implosive
effect of "downsizing" and having "delegates" where we used to have
representatives, directly
responsible to those they serve.
Shock waves from the general crisis reach even us in the Way of Life movement but my
advice to
you is to close your eyes and pretend it is a good orgasm. It will pass and we put our
gratitude in
print.
In Loving Service,
Bo S.
01 Jul 1998
Could you please elaborate on what you are trying to say? I thought this was a literature
project and
not a movement. To me, a movement, is when you are trying to change the current situation
because you disagree with it or it is no longer viable. As I see it we are sharing our
experience,
strength, and hope as it relates to a topic. This is not a new concept or movement I
believe this has
been going on since NA or even further back when AA was founded. This is how I see it,
then again
I could be wrong!
In Loving Service,
Tom B.
02 Jul 1998
Dear Tom,
Great post! I have been in several revolutions and it sounds like you have too. I learned
a long time
ago that the revolution would be when people learned to change themselves. That is what I
love
about the Steps. They guide the change without confining it and the Traditions allow us to
do all
this without killing each other.
Perhaps for me the literature is the instance of legitimizing the impulse or emotion that
usually gets
loose and flies away. Thinking, and feeling, our way through a subject to the satisfaction
of
informed and involved onlookers is what makes our stuff quiver and breathe. The movement -
and
when it began, we called it a movement - is from those who have it to those who need it.
As they
pass it on, the movement grows. Disagreement and viability can motivate so can curiosity
or
something that just wells up in your heart and has to get out. You are nothing like wrong
as far as I
am concerned.
In the book, In Loving Service, I wrote about how to do service and be both effective and
spiritual.
It is an art. I am thinking of Mao Tse Tung's reaction when they explained that the
revolution was
really about love and people caring for each other. He paused, as well as I remember this,
and said
it was based on something deeper than just caring for one another.
The 'General Crisis' article refers to the fact that as I share with a variety of members
around the
country, they all seem to be having similar problems. Like the same underlying issue with
different
labels and names to obscure the commonality. I remember when I first got in World
Services, it
became possible to literally 'check' with areas all over. There is a comfort in all this
for me because it
means we are not alone, whatever we are going through. Like NA means never alone.
When we first set up and enlarged the structure, we meant to collect information and
spread it
outward so that all put in and all took out. In a short time, it became less and less
anonymous and it
became important to some to 'control and regulate' what people were allowed to know. I
stared at
this in nearly absolute horror and wondered, what, oh what will God do about this! I
really figured
something cool would come up - and here we are: complete, creative, freedom!
Thanks for keeping me on my toes!
In Loving Service,
Bo
02 Jul 1998
Dear Tom,
You seem to be having a real hard time with all this. Maybe you should just pray for
understanding
and double up on some meetings. You may even want to do a little more 4th step work. I
honestly
hope you come through this clean.
Steve S.
13 Jul 1998
Thank you for your concern Steve, but you need not worry yourself about my staying clean.
The
problem as I see it is perception, as a friend once told me, there is your truth, my
truth, and then
there is the truth. As I see things (my perception), the NA Way of Life Literature Project
(Not
movement) was being written by the fellowship for the fellowship. When an individual
decides to
make it his by copyrighting it in his name, it is no longer being written by the
fellowship for the
fellowship.
I have been involved with this project in my area for a number of years and feel that this
individual
is betraying the members of the fellowship that I love with all my heart. Although the
spiritual
enlightenment, love, and fellowshipping I experienced while working on this project can
not be
taken away, the result of hard work can. Every time I mention any disgust or concern about
what
has happened, I get this fake bullshit about "man I can feel your pain", or
"I hope you don't use over
this", that is what lead to my earlier post.
"Does anyone remember the part in the movie Psycho, where Norman was sitting in the
back of the
police car after he was caught and the fly landed on him. The conversation he was having
with
himself went something like this, " Look there is fly on me, I could kill it, but if
I don't they will say
look he's so nice he wouldn't even kill a fly. For some reasons these post have made me
think about
that scene."
I feel this way because after being the cause of the division of what was a group project
of spiritually
motivated individuals sharing their experience, strength, and hope. The individual causing
this
division will not take responsibility for his actions. When anybody post anything that
disagrees with
his point of view he tries to act like he is empathizing with them or he ignores them and
goes off on
other rant. So this is why you my feel the anger or hostility from my post, because I feel
the
fellowship and I as a whole has been violated by this individual. So as I said, you do
have to worry
about me using over this, and should be able to feel my pain especially if you took part
in creating it.
In Loving Service,
Tom B.
03 Jul 1998
Interestingly, your sincerity comes through loud and clear. I can easily see how if the
feelings and
concerns you allow were all that was involved, I might feel the same way. My job is not to
be
comfortable or take only the easy way. And the reason the material was protected had
nothing at all
to do with either changing the nature of the project, most particularly with violating
your feelings or
trust.
I won't try to explain it all to you, because obviously you have a head on your shoulders
and use it.
I will say only two things: First, the best part of the NA Way of Life book is going to be
written in
the immediate future. Secondly, at some point people who have thought of the work as
nothing
more than a 'rant' will suddenly look at it in terms of commercial value. Have you ever
had your
wallet stolen? It makes you careful, doesn't it. With a conservative value of ten million
dollars over
the first five years in sales, it just seemed like time. We will make it clear that we
will write it, we
will take it to as many thousands of addicts and get both their reaction and input and
then we will
protect what they have written.
I had a nasty experience years ago. A work we entrusted to others was treated like a piece
of
property. It was diminished in the market place. If it were only my book, there would be
no issue,
no movement, and no problem. Moving it from me to you, from mine to ours, is a real
project.
With all the hoopla, nobody stole anything and nobody left town.
We have to allow that what we undertake here is a serious effort to 12 Step the world, not
just each
other. The pathway we took before with the Basic Text has become closed to us that is why
we go
this way. While others may look at the changes in World Service as another random
none-event.
Philosophically it is not even that interesting. I look at the Traditions as cancelled out
by the
Concepts. The Group Conscience Structure to Serve replaced by a system that reduces
representatives who are required to vote their regions conscience to delegates, who may
vote
however they please that day. Corporations have never been noted for their compassion and
devotion to truth. Corporations are about money and people who want to control. In the
corporation sense, all that would have to happen without the copyright protestation is for
someone,
not even elected yet to wake up one day and decide the corporation needs the money.
So, the copyright insures to me that my efforts are not going to be wasted or undone just
because
someone gets the bright idea that our love and caring can be sold for money. Please note,
I am still
working for love and gratitude. That's all it is, really. I hope not to change your mind
or totally set
your fears to rest but just to acknowledge your concern and much as I can to let you know
there may
be other explanations for what has happened.
In Loving Service,
Bo
04 Jul 1998
Thank you for sharing your views with me. What I meant by rants, were your post not the
writing's
in the book. I guess on my part I should have came out and said what I was feeling from
the
beginning.
Your perception is based on your frame of reference. It is unfortunate that things in the
past have
happened to cause you to feel the way you do. I was not around then and will not pretend
to know
what you actually went through. I have read some about it and heard things here and there.
The
unfortunate thing is that the current situation does divide the fellowship. Couldn't this
have been
handled differently? Couldn't the NA Way foundation copyrighted the book in the name of
the
foundation once it became a legal entity and still accomplished the same thing?
Truly I can see your intention are good, I just believe they are misguided (My
perception). I am not
ready to give up on this project yet. Although as a Literature Committee, we have decided
to quit
working on the NA Way of Life project until things are rectified. Or we will just move on
to a new
project, as we agreed there is plenty of service to be given when people are willing to
serve. In my
last post at the end what I meant to say was that this would NOT make me use, not that it
would.
Although that statement did make for a stronger message, I have not thought about using
over any
of this.
It is my personal belief that we need to do what my sponsor told me to do about my past,
that we
don't close the door on it, but we learn from it. We don't live in the past either, If I
let things from
my past paralyze my actions today I am not truly living. I have a question for you Bo,
"If you could
change anything that has happened what would it be and is there a viable solution to this
problem?"
In Loving Service,
Tom B.
07 Jul 1998
Dear Tom,
First, let me thank you for your clarity and focus. The only thing I would change at this
point would
have been to copyright the material earlier. If you re-read the preface and introduction
to the book, I
hope you will see that by adjusting to the realities of today, I have found a way to be
cheerful,
happy, and effective almost all the time. By delaying an obvious thing in the beginning, I
sought to
give people time to sort out their feelings and find the truth for themselves. As you will
see if you re-
read the material, what is happening now is no different from the description written ten
years ago
or so. The only thing is now the service structure is crippled beyond what would have
seemed
possible ten years ago. Apathy mixed with a confusing variety of perceptions and
viewpoints, some
of which may be accurate and many of which will surely prove wrong. Tough times for basic
changes.
This perception is cushioned in me by the long time watching it come on and of course by
the
writing that is both in the NA Way of Life book as it exists and in formulation at the
present time.
Waiting on the copyright only strengthened an unfortunate impression that something
extraordinary
was done. I am hoping that the members in your area who have worked on this book have
access to
all the materials sent out over the years, particularly the 1st and 2nd Annual Reports of
March 1997
and 1998 respectively. Without knowing the WOL Plan of Action, there may be some who even
now do not really believe we are getting the word out to the world wide Fellowship. There
are
plenty of distractions that would make it easy for me to stop work on the translation of
our material,
some of which you helped with, into Spanish, French and German. The material will be
scrutinized
by 'Way' people who speak that language. It will be published on the web just like as the
English -
American - version. We will maintain and handle two-way communications with members in
America along with all other nationalities.
It will take time for all this to come true but then, this is only a dream. If it should
come true, so
much the better. I pledge to keep faith with supporters like you and pray fortitude to
hear even those
who yell at me and ask others what they might be saying, really. This is all hard on me
too. But,
with God's help, we will come through and reach a point where everybody will be in
agreement.
Some of the problems MAY be that:
1) Some say any copyright of the material 'ruins' the change that WS whatever will
accept it. Since I outline carefully in the introductions that the way is blocked to
placing the material in the structure, it is illogical to think they would suddenly
'come around'. It is my understanding that the World Lit Committee no longer
exists.
2) Some members may not realize at depth, my personal relationship to the
material is not changed, by the filing of the form. This is something author's get
when they write something. The fact that it has been and still is my intent to
transfer this status to the general Fellowship does not mean it is up for grabs as a
literary work in progress. I have to keep faith with the many who have worked
on this as well as those to come. Only my past experience serves to guide and
make clear a path few have walked and can speak of from personal experience.
I have faith that God will see us through this.
3) If I sought some personal gain out of the project beyond the thrill of seeing the
dream come true, I would hope that I would do some things VERY differently.
But that is not what is needed. I have finally realized, that I really don't need
much to keep myself going. Through the grace of God, my sons are doing OK.
So, me getting something personally would probably get in the way. Addicts are
so damn suspicious that any appearance of impropriety seems to inflame them.
They will not only look a 'gift horse' in the mouth, they will kill the horse and
autopsy the mouth. It is a matter of how our disease works in these areas. We
have to avoid conflicting with active addiction within the Fellowship, which
exists in all of us to some extent.
4) We have never sought to turn the material over to WS for the reasons
mentioned. The word is they don't want it anymore that we would send it there.
They are 'keepers'. The creative tasks require different skills. The Basic Text
was possible because we wrote and implemented the guidelines in a period of
uniform and consistent positive energy. This work cannot be done in a negative
or hateful atmosphere. We are concerned with spiritual matters and the
application of spiritual principles that help us stay clean and live longer, happier
lives. Problems of money, property and prestige first injure, then overwhelm
spiritual things in the world. Then, in solitude and earnest desire, the spiritual
arise again. At least, that is how it seems to this addict. Writing has become
such a part of my life now that I have made peace with the fact that I would like
to finish a book myself. But my art so far has been to get others involved so that
their voice, not mine, will be heard. I had a real disgusting feeling of impotence
and staggering grief and helping NA speak really turns me on.
5) An attorney, Dick Hitt, advised me to copyright the book in my name until the
corporation was formed. One of the subjects covered in the annual reports has
been that while the content of the book is totally open to fellowship input and
development, the nature of the project and hence the 'Foundation' is not. It
even says this in plain English. For me it is a matter of logic: why write a book
by addicts, for addicts, and then turn it over to anyone to re-write? Doesn't that
make sense to you? I will have nothing to do with such nonsense. For this
reason, we have a written WOL Plan to review, input and process the material,
then to protect it in that form from then on and that means NOT turning it over
to anyone. If that were done, it would become their property to be treated,
rewritten and sold as a literary 'property'. Each person that I have welcomed to
this work has been assured this would not happen. If you have heard or been
told any different, I would recommend that you go to the preface and
introduction. Right now, the original Introduction as well as this year's Annual
Report appears on the NA Way of Life Chalkboard. Download or print out for
hardcopy.
I wrote something earlier for you and I hope it may help close any gaps between you and I:
Against
tampering with God's Will.
This book began in the mid 1980's as the cold war between the loyal NA members who
understood
and supported the group conscience process of NA along with the Twelve Traditions. WSO was
growing each year and champed at the controls placed on them by the Fellowship. The
restrictions
seemed artificial and uninformed.
It was easy to think of the Fellowship as dumb and behind the times. The antipathy allowed
the
information that should have been passed on the be held back in many cases and resulted in
an
increasingly uninformed Fellowship, especially as the information they should have
received in
more friendly times. The conservative, traditionalists were perhaps too gracious and
temperate.
Many may have expected the problems to lessen or just to go away. I was there and recall
vividly, I
didn't even like to think about what I saw going on. The Traditionalists believed in Group
Conscience and the Twelve Traditions in both a technical and an superstitious way. The
technical
side survives in writing from the period. The superstitious side survives in those who
still believe
that way today. By superstitious, I don't mean unreal - just real to those who see it. The
Traditionalists structured everything to better help and support NA members starting
groups,
maintaining groups and working in corollaries like H&I, P.I. and Literature. The WSO
people
seemed to think more an more in terms of money, power and information. To them, they
seemed to
absolutely dominate over the Traditionalists who stressed keying into the beliefs and
ideals of NA
members.
This devastating 'cold war' couldn't stop us because for every soldier who dropped, ten
rose to take
their place. In an information war, the opposition could never afford to show their hand.
They
would just keep working with new people and any who showed allegiance to the Fellowship
against
them were dismissed. A few 'nice guys' who disagreed disagreeably were kept on to preserve
an air
of fragile indulgence and an illusion of fair play. When the chips were down, it was easy
to see what
was happening. Many who saw these things just left the Fellowship or left off active
involvement
with the service structure. In either case, the Group Conscience/12 Traditions side lost
its voice as
its views were no longer presented in Fellowship publications.
All during this time, I continued to serve in a variety of capacities from the WS Board of
Trustees to
the group level coffee chairman and an area newsletter editor. And all during this time, I
continued
to remain active on the phone and traveling to conventions. I also wrote for
'non-structural'
newsletters going back a decade or more: from SOS - Speaking of Service in the '80's to
New
Attitudes in the '90's. Also, in between the long distance calls, personal visits and
attendance at all
the history conferences I could get to, I wrote on the NA Way of Life book. I came up with
a plan
to form a foundation to get other members involved. The foundation is to protect the book
from
outside and inside forces that were bound to try to take over control of the document as
the size and
quality became attractive. This was called the NA Foundation. At this time, the material
is
protected by a copyright in my name for the NA Foundation.
Along the way, a member from Michigan and another member from New England put our book on
the Internet. The member in Michigan lost the space he was using to host and the web
address
became the one in New Hampshire. We are very grateful to both members for their loving
dedication and support. Since March of 1996, the NA Way of Life has been available for
view and
download free of charge to NA members all over the world.
Today, we have a plan under way to take the material into other languages beginning with
Spanish,
French, and German. The increased availability of software and the processing ability of
computers
is making all this possible. We still exist with no funding. Hardcopies of the book are
made
available by a variety of supportive members on a personal basis only. We try to avoid
financial
considerations because addicts seem easily confused by these issues and if we took the
time to
explain everything to everyone, there would be no time left to write.
Our main policy statements are made in the original Preface and Introduction, which
attempt to go
into the nuts and bolts of why we have to do this book this way. We hope and pray that the
attraction will reach those who are ready for it when they become ready. It takes faith,
courage and
stamina to do this work in love and gratitude to those who helped us reach a point where
we could
help others in our turn.
So, again, thanks and please share this with others. Our next Conference is in Dalton,
Georgia. I
will recommend that the term 'director' be dropped and that the term 'member' to replace
it. We do
not need directors, we need members to work this miracle! A corporation is not writing
this book,
God-filled members are. God, save us from the corporations!
In Loving Service,
Bo S.
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hits in 1999!
Reprinted from the
N.A. FELLOWSHIP USE ONLY
Copyright � December 1998
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N.A. Foundation Group
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All rights reserved. This draft may be copied by members of Narcotics Anonymous for the purpose of writing input for future drafts, enhancing the recovery of NA members and for the general welfare of the Narcotics Anonymous Fellowship as a whole. The use of an individual name is simply a registration requirement of the Library of Congress and not a departure from the spirit or letter of the Pledge, Preface or Introduction of this book. Any reproduction by individuals or organizations outside the Fellowship of Narcotics Anonymous is prohibited. Any reproduction of this document for personal or corporate monetary gain is prohibited.
Last update September 29, 2005