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From: Rhonda P
Category: Category 1
Date: 07 Nov 1999
Time: 10:05:35
Remote Name: spider-wo041.proxy.aol.com
I am a 31 years old. I have been doing speed since the age of 16. This has mad my life a living hell!! I only do the drug a couple times a month but the effect it has on me is horriffic.....I have a complusive problem ...I pick at my skin and have several scares... I hide in the basement for days when I come down from the speed ....while I m in hiding waiting for recovery of my problem I say the same things to myself....." this is it Im done ...never again ......why do I do this to my self? I quit I cant stand this feeling anymore"...yet a few weeks later when I feel like my normal self I go and do it all over again. IM SO TIRED OF THIS VICOUS CIRCLE........ I want it all to end I want to be a normal person... I have lost many jobs, cant seem to finish school.....I am going to college... (once again) to go for my Registered Medical Assistant.... I thought this time I would make it ....but here I am in hiding.....I cant go My face is full of scabs that are unhidable by the use of make up ....My husband also does this drug.....sometimes I wonder if thats why I was attracted to him because he used. I just need someone to talk to!!! Please someone .....I need to vent and stop this maddness that is brewing inside of me.
Thank you
Rhonda P