ACCEPTANCE

Through ongoing recovery, we all find our addiction trying to regain control of our lives through the weakest point in our personal program.

We may find ourselves, without warning, caught up in substitution - an extension of our basic addiction. It may be food, sex, vomiting, gambling or any number of combinations.

The acceptance we find in the Third Step and the simplification of our requirements for membership to its most basic desire for freedom, stress the surrender and the hope we ourselves felt as newcomers. We constantly strive to accept life in life's terms and avoid preoccupying ourselves with blaming others. Even if there are others involved, we must find a way to better our situation and the key to doing that is personal responsibility.

The belief that our Higher Power had taken control of our lives and our wills allows us to take acceptance into every part of our lives. In short, the word expands through application into something we do almost habitually. Acceptance becomes a working principle in our lives.

On several levels, acceptance helps us both in personal recovery and service to others. On one level, we know the Fellowship got along before we came and will continue with or without us. Service can be no ego trip.

On another level, we can feel the spirit moving through us.

Sometimes it can be frightening even though we know it is loving - It's so big. We just accept and do our part in faith. This is the absolute best any of us can do personally.

Acceptance, as a principle, can be a doorway to solutions.

Since real acceptance tunes is into reality, we waste less time, energy and emotion trying to do things beyond our personal power.

This extra time and energy becomes available to help us do better in those areas of our lives where we find we are able to be effective. Imagine, if you had an extra half an hour to talk with those you love or an extra half day to do your job. Our capacity for quality increases when we're less concerned with quantity.

As we grow spiritually, we find others will react differently to us. Some may become jealous. We learn not to flaunt our spirituality. Our acceptance may infuriate someone who wants us upset. Many times, we will experience the feeling that we have done something wrong only to find our we're reacting as if we had something to hide. Many of our old reactions simply don't become us in recovery. As we change, the world around us appears to change.

Acceptance of what God chooses to do with our will and life after we make our decision to let go, enjoins us to help make the way plain only to those who ask for help in some way. A phone call from someone who knows we are a member, a coincidental encounter or a person who shows up at an NA meeting is open to help. We have realized the vanity of trying to carry our message to those who do not want it.

Acceptance taken to the level of a principle also requires that we check out our facts and pray to make sure we know what we're accepting!

While serenity applies to those things we cannot change, it takes courage and wisdom for those things we can help make better. Many of us ask, "What would God have me do?" in a variety of situations. Often, an unsuspected opportunity appears to us.

Though the word acceptance may have a connotation of resignation, impotence, compromise and other meanings for many of us, recovery places acceptance in it's positive form. It is honest.

For addicts who are accustomed to throwing themselves at the world, it is a new wisdom to be able to back off. It is also an new choice.

As addicts, we seem to have an innate tendency to find closed doors and brick walls to butt with our heads. Acceptance can be a way of going on, opening ourselves to God's Will when a door is closed to us. At least for the time being.

Acceptance can be seen in a far more positive light where we are repeatedly put into positions where we are forced to face some challenge or demand. Many of us grow in recovery to be able to meet these challenges and satisfy them in every way.

In our war with life, we often take a characteristic exception to things. Learning to live with ease and comfort may be a process of learning to be more accepting of things.

Accepting newcomers as members whether they act right to us or not. Accepting that if God's truly running the show, many things cease to be our business. Accepting a genuine love of life back into our scheme of things. Accepting that what may appear frightening to us is as nothing to our loving God. Accepting that others may think, act and believe differently from us and still be good people, not threat to us. Accepting that, as addicts, we simply suffer from a disease and that daily abstinence and spiritual growth are the most important items on any given day.

Acceptance in time may mellow into gratitude. It seems that without gratitude, grateful acceptance, we never come to rest and have a tough time going on in the spiritual sense. As long as we are rooted in things, we are tied to them. When we realize that our needs are being met, somewhat regardless of our worthiness, we can take the option to slow down whatever we are doing and do it better.